~orion~

Something that always bugs me is the insanity that is people parking. There are two main categories of insanity. The first is selection and the second is execution.

Ok, selection. What I mean by that is people selecting their parking spots. People seems damned determined in their ways. They want to park in that exact spot or as close as physically possible to the door of where they want to get even if they have to drive around for 20 minutes. They don’t even realize that they by the time they find the ideal spot they could have grabbed any open spot, did what they needed to do and be back on their way home. That’s only part one. The next aspect of selection is the camper. They are the person that will hold up all the cars behind them for 5 minutes and slow-fatty takes 5 minutes to get into their car and back out. I mean is it really that hard to take the currently open parking spot that’s a whopping 20 feet further away? Is that too much to ask? The last group is similar to the campers. I call them the stalkers. They are very prevalent during the busy Christmas shopping season at malls. This is how it works. The instant you walk out of the mall with your 27 bags full of crap you will be very slowly followed by a minivan. This minivan will slowly follow you until they determine which vehicle you drive at which time they revert to camper behavior. All the while there are 5 poor saps behind the minivan who just want to get the hell out of the mall parking lot and go home. I really like to mess with the stalkers. If I am walking towards my car and end up with a stalker I love to weave back and forth between different rows of parking or cut across multiple rows to throw off all their hard stalking work.

Now execution. People in general either suck at parking and/or don’t care. How hard is it to stick your vehicle between the two yellow lines. It’s like coloring for adults. Just stay between the lines! Oh this just reminded me of an interesting site I found a while ago: http://www.youparklikeanasshole.com/. Also make sure to check out their galleries and flickr page, they are linked under various news posts. I must admit it is awfully entertaining to watch some moron try to parallel park their car in a spot that’s big enough for at least 2 cars and still fail miserably (saw this one earlier tonight). Is it really that hard to make sure that you’re within the lines? Is it really that hard to take the extra 10 seconds to correct your park job if you are over the lines? Man people are lazy and ignorant.

As a side note why do parking garages around here consist of 80% compact parking spots when only like 13.4% of the actual vehicles are compact. It makes no sense dammit!