The Game
I recently finished reading a very interesting book. It was called The Game: Penetrating the Secret Society of Pickup Artists by Neil Strauss. It was a very entertaining book and an easy read. Basically the author is sent a book editor to investigate the underground pickup artists scene. The book follows the author’s transformation from AFC (average frustrated chump) to mPUA (master pickup artist) over a span of 2 or so years. It’s quite interesting to see how his perception of women, picking up women and societal interactions as a whole change throughout the book.
There is lot of good information on how to be a pickup artist in this but. But, thankfully, it’s not really a how-to book. All the lessons come from stories and anecdotes. From what I can tell the purpose of the book isn’t to instruct in the ways of the pickup artists, rather, it’s showing what that society is like, how it functions, what kinds of people join and what drives them.
Initially when reading this book I wanted to learn all their techniques so that I could use them. But then I thought, is that who I would really want to be? The end answer is no, I don’t want to be a pickup artist, that’s just now who I am. However, at the same time, is there any harm in learning a few things to help make my life easier in the lady department? No. I think it all really boils down to 3 things: external confidence, internal confidence and differentiators. External confidence is simple, you have to exude confidence, everyone around you has to believe that you are confident in what you say and do. Internal confidence is that you on the inside have to be strong and not buckle unuder pressure. You actually have to BE confident. The last is differentiators. What’s different about you? What do you possess that no one else does? As a corollary, can you tell/show the other person that you are different?
So now that I know all this cool stuff I get chicks all the time right? Wrong. Just because I know some stuff doesn’t mean I’m gonna use it or have the balls to use it. This whole pick up artist thing seems so deceitful. There’s a quote from the book that is repeated in the book and always stuck out at me: “It’s not lying, just flirting.” For me, that really sums it up.
For me, bars are not the ideal place to pick up the ladies. Why? My greatest positive qualities are not my dashing good looks or my freaky crazy dancing skills. It’s harder than fuck to have a conversation in a noisy bar. (If you haven’t noticed, I’m to the point of the post where I just ramble fragmented thoughts). I wish I could find one of those lounges that they always have in the Bond movies. Ya know, all fancy, with people sitting around conversing with tolerable music in the background.
Oh I also am frustrated by the games both men and women play. It seems so … silly.
A woman has a close male friend. This means that he is probably interested in her, which is why he hangs around so much. She sees him strictly as a friend. This always starts out with, you’re a great guy, but I don’t like you in that way. This is roughly the equivalent for the guy of going to a job interview and the company saying, You have a great resume, you have all the qualifications we are looking for, but we’re not going to hire you. We will, however, use your resume as the basis for comparison for all other applicants. But, we’re going to hire somebody who is far less qualified and is probably an alcoholic. And if he doesn’t work out, we’ll hire somebody else, but still not you. In fact, we will never hire you. But we will call you from time to time to complain about the person that we hired.
i love that quote–always will, because it’s so true! i also can’t really say why women do what they do (as portrayed by DragonflyBlade21) and i’m not even sure if i also fall under the mentioned category…i’m going to think about that and get back to you…
Cheryl said this on January 21st, 2007 at 3:36 pm
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