~orion~

I have a confession to make. It’s something that I am ashamed to have done. No, no I haven’t killed anyone or something like that. But it’s something that has stuck with me for around 10 years. It was way back in 7th or 8th grade. See I had this friend who was … shall we say … low on the social ladder. He was a very kind, good natured kid. He was just a bit awkward in social situations and as such was made fun of a lot. Sometimes it was quite cruel the things people say to him. I remember one day talking to him on the phone and I said something like

… Yea, I know everyone makes fun of you and I feel bad. But I only make fun of you so that the others won’t make fun of me. You know what I mean? I’m just trying to fit in. …

So basically I made fun of the kid so that the others would think I’m cool and so that they wouldn’t make fun of me. Looking back I am appauled at the way I acted. I deserve a kick in the balls for not having the balls to stick up for my friend. I mean Christ I made fun of my friend just to save my own ass. How shallow is that? This kid went through a LOT of teasing all throughout school. He deserved better. He deserved better from me his friend. Wait no, I wasn’t his friend. A real friend would not have done what I did.

I am terribly sorry for what I did. I hope I never do something like that again.